Friday, July 31, 2009

I think i'm a clone now

There's always two of me just a-hangin' around
I think I'm a clone now
'Cause every chromosome is a hand me down


I've never had to work that hard at finding a job. (Although I'm *apparently* a dead ringer for Weird Al. Don't know if I could make money dressing up like him... I'd constantly be buying brown eyebrow pencils to reapply the chest hair as it has a tendency to rub off. Plus this look ruined my hair. Seriously. My hair's been a frizzy clump of shit since the "Weird Al incident".)

I applied to Alan Thicke's *Smellers, and was offered the job a few hours after the interview. I applied for "what the heck is a rutabaga" *Basic Foods (no more, no less) was offered the job on the spot and made an office personnel as opposed to the cashier position i had applied for. I put in resumes at *Home Hardonware, *Shmooze Company (mediocre shoes for not so much money) and *Homesenseless. *Home Hardonware offered me a job without interview at another location as a supervisor, but that other location was farther away in an area without a bus route and i didn't have a car, so i had to decline. I was offered and accepted the job at *Homesenseless, only to have *The Shmooze Company call me later that day and offer me a supervisor job as well, but i stuck with *Homesenseless. I quit *Homesenseless, and a couple of days later was working at "thanks for making a gigantic mess 'cause you knew we were coming, and for the record we're NOT impressed by the used condoms stuck between the couch cushions!" *Jolly Jaid. I quit *Jolly Jaid and took a hiatus off of work for a bit as i was dating someone in Toronto and was there most of the time. Once that relationship crumbled (whaddya mean you ATE while i was in the shower?!) , i applied at *Misha's arts and crafts and instead of the cashier job that i had applied for, got lead sales of the general arts department. While still working at *Mishas, i applied for a position at "hey she learned all the parts really quickly she MUST be sleeping with her manager" *Hell on earth Puke equipment, got the job and after 2 months of being a parts shipper i was promoted to parts counter. I left *Puke and 3 days later was hired on the spot for *Smavey Smee.

(*obviously the names have been slightly altered to protect something or other... )

And now I've applied for 7 jobs and haven't heard back from one.

I realize there's a bit of a recession, there were a lot of people laid off and are searching for jobs as well. I know that it's tougher than usual to get a good job these days, but despite knowing all this, it's incredibly frustrating! I keep wondering what's wrong... why aren't i atleast getting calls for interviews? Is there something wrong with my resume? Does it stink!? Do they not like the fact that i left work in May of '08 and hadn't worked since? Was i just always lucky and now the luck has run out?

I've never been this broke in my life. (well, my parents wouldn't agree with that statement. They had a certain nickname for me - which i won't divulge here - for many years) Yes, my husband makes good money, and we're still able to get by, but i can't stand not contributing. So i still contribute in small ways here and there, even though i can't afford to. We have lots of money locked up in GIC's and RSP's (and TSFAs, TGIFs and BYOBs) to save for a house, so we're okay in that department (and I'm glad it's locked in, or we'd have dick all for a house when my parents come back!) but I'm still freaking out. A year has passed already since we've been in my parents house while they're in The Netherlands (soon to be Vienna, Austria, as my mom was transferred again unexpectedly) and i haven't saved one penny. Not only am i freaking out about being able to afford a house in 2 years, but what about something sooner. Christmas! I know it's still 5 months away, but unless i get some income incredibly soon, there's no way i can give anyone anything... unless i make it. I hope everyone has a swiffer! 'Cause they'll be all getting my reusable swiffer cloths!

And still not having sales on Etsy is bugging me as well. I'm starting to doubt my work. Is it not good enough? I know i don't have any spectacular items on there, but when i see new people (even newer than me) already making 5 or more sales, it's a tad disheartening. Crochet was the only products i could put on right now. I'd love to put all my photography on there, they're all ready to be posted, but i need to print a bunch first before i post them, but i need money to do that. I desperately want to put my Christmas cards on there, but i have to print them first and again i need money to do that. I'd love to start painting and put those on there, but i don't have any canvas, and i obviously need money in order to buy it. So I'm stuck in a rut. A big huge one.

Deep breaths. I think i need that huge creepy doll that the guy on the Inventors show a few years back had made. You press its belly and it says in a soft male voice "everythings gonna be oooooookaaaaaay". I shiver at the thought of that doll. Maybe that's because I've always believed that soft talking males are all serial killers?!

But i can't let it get me down, right? One step at a time. Can't let everything get too overwhelming! This too shall pass... I just wish it would stop taking it's sweet ass time and pass already!




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